Bombeiro Vagabundo

The best fireworks company in Brazil

  • Viking Madonna

    Viking Madonna: Memories of my melancholy hoars by Gabriel Garcia Marquez

    To our list of hoaring literature, we must add the below fine novella (just 5 hours on audible), which is about a 90 year old man who orders a 14 year old virgin hoar from his favorite madam. Apart from the legalities and morality, there are bits of health tips for we old dudes (vagabundo himself is 88′; and he notes that Hemingway once said all great writers are liars, and Vagabundo aspires to be a great writer).

    Vagabundo is writing his own novella of this genre with a 21 year old silly viking girl here in rio using his 17 centimeter pen to dip into the tight, white, fit, yoga and swimming trained inner thighs of his viking princess, who swims at 05h30 and does yoga at 18h, and vagabundo follows her long blond legs to do exactly the same routine like a good slave to his viking madonna queen! She doesn’t carry a pistol or a knife yet like the Russian, she carries a iphone and Vagabundo will carry religiously a iphone battery for her for she uses the iphone to call in drone strikes on the ballsacs of Russian and Commando Vermelha in a forthcoming Tropa de Elite 3 / Cidade de Deus 2/ Dom Season 3/ Top Gun 3 all with Madonna fucking Tom Cruise in a Russian Hind Helicopter that rises like a angry Eagle from a 20,000 ton roll on / roll off ship that Vagabundo, 88, and Silly Viking, 21, hijack by the dozen down in Porto Allegre, Santos, and up in Salvador, Fortaleza, and Havana, where Vagabundo grows a beard to blend in with his fellow communists, giving lectures on Lenin in perfect Russian while drinking fine Tequila by the gallon dripping down the snow white blond ass cheeks of the Silly Viking Madonna who sits on his face three times a day, between sunrise ocean swims and sunset yoga out at Recreio Praia Macumba or at Praia Abrico or Praia Boi out in Buzios or at Arrail do Cabo or Ihla Grande.

    More than once in the months since we met on a boat party where we talked endlessly in English as the Viking Madonna comes from a civilized nation, she messaged Vagabundo on Life360, and with SWISS NAVY friends, we all came running to pull her skinny blond ass out of the trouble that a svelte viking princess can find in Rio de Janeiro, even when she had the Russian ball gagged for a little dupla gone wrong. But, Vagabundo, never missing a chance to fuck a Russian, gobbled up some generic viagra and cialis like a viking from the long Schwartz line of the baltics, and he slid his bratwurst into the kunt of the Russian, breeding her like his grandfather so many decades ago in Stalingrad, a parting gift to Lenin and its youth league lead by the Russian’s grandfather.

    Negra Monique came over today, the sabbath (Shabbat Shalom, my flock), and for 300r she milked my bratwurst 6 times for a CPF of 50+ uber, which is the basis for the pathetic GDP (Garota da Programa) of Lula’s communist cock-sucking experiment in Latino Socialism, not to be controversial, and purely for educational and artistic purposes. Monique cleaned, all the better because Vagabundo lead by example and cleaned alongside her negra booty, but all the time, Vagabundo thought of his Viking Madonna, 21, with her blond viking hair wet against her face as he kissed her on the beach for the first time on Thursday, later in the day to suck on her pert young, 21 year old nipples in his apartment, which was a mess where she had to recharge her iphone and we ate a meal of salmon na brasa from Casuarina. As I type this, Anne Amari is messaging me, and my viking madonna has an academic event, but I am sick of Anne Amari who doesn’t fuck enough, or clean, and always has emergencies and refuses to learn english despite Vagabundo dropping hints if not outright commands. Vagabundo is a terrible person in how he blatantly refused all of Nina Deponca’s pleas for work as a cleaning only maid (300r for cleaning, she proposed, to which Vagabundo countered 50 or 100; remember men, as Sperto says, minimum wage here is 1300 reais a month. So don’t overpay). Vagabundo could not screenshot his messages to Nina Deponca as they are offensive, both on the grounds of content, and on the grounds of being pornographic in that Nia Nacci 2015’s mouth is wrapped around Vagabundo’s bratwurst.

    I fuck.

    I write.

    Like Henry “Vagabundo” Miller

    Like Gabriel Garcia Marquez

    Because on days around Centro and Tijuca I put in my earphones, and I listen to Marquez’ Memories of my melancholy hoars

    Truth is that in South America, SOUTHCOM to we SWISS Navy veterans, the rules are different, thankfully.

    In 2030, my viking Madonna and I will swim out to a SWISS NAVY submarine at sunrise from a REDACTED beach. Perhaps we will skip our normal breakfast at the little coffee shop across the street from Centaurus where the macho cops show how bad their weapons handling is by putting the barrels of their M4 rifles on their boots, threatening to have to explain to their commanding officers how they shot their toes off to look a little more cool. But the local cops all train jiu jitsu. Pick the coffee shops where the cops lounge around as a rule, and put on the patch that shows your blood type in correct Rio de Janeiro Bombeiro fashion, give the cops a nod as you kiss your viking Madonna on the lips on the way to her Portuguese exam, confident that your street Portuguese is good enough to get a cops number at Paris Cafe even if it is not good enough to get a stripper’s number. Then meet her just off campus to avoid the embarrassment to her of dating a man 67 years her senior. I drink the blood of young clones and am injected with the stem cells of the Boys from Brazil under the supervision of Slavic Orthodox doctors working for the Russian Consulate in Leblon who have ski-ed across the frontier from Russia into Norway, then South to the Baltic, and from thence aboard a Virginia class boat chartered by the Vatican to bring the Book of Ruth in all the Baltic Languages in Rio to again start civilization. In the salty heaven of our sunrise swims, my Viking Madonna paces our swims, as she strokes on her fins from her long legs which I bought her at Decathlon in Barra.

    Selah

    [QUOTE=Explorer69;2914229]I am not certain if this can give anyone new information where and what to hunt. But I decided to tell a little about my experiences in Rio de Janeiro we all do it a bit differently.

    In order that you shall understand my style, I need to introduce myself. First of all, I am 80 eighty. Years old. At home (Northern Europe), people believe that I am 70, however, Brazilians think I am in my late 50 ies. I still have most of my (now white) hair and I am reasonably slim. I am blue-eyed. Big plus in Brazil and originally very blond. I am single (widower).

    My first time in Rio was in 1983 and I have been a regular since that being in love with Brasileiras. I will not tell about all my experiences during the years, but concentrate on my last 12-days visit in April. I am still fully active at work. I am very lucky: during the last 5 years I visited Rio every 3rd month 3 days connected to work and another week for play.

    Usually I stay in the same apartment on Ipanema or maybe in a hotel on Copacabana. My last visit was in April. I am lazy I have a regular routine. Usually start around 10 pm at Mabs. I almost never pick something there I avoid the sharks like fire. But a few times, I have found some gem: the young girl who now and then would go to get some extra money for a new dress. After Mabs, I go to Casablanca around 11 pm. In most cases I find what I am looking for, but I have also gone home alone. I look for the young, unexperienced girl although sometimes I go with the older (30! More experienced ones. I have fucked several of the strippers there.

    I spend time interviewing the girls. I never ask for what services they provide I am pretty standard and when we get the right connection they are in for what I want: mutual oral sex and fucking. The interview is more to check the girl’s personality, to get a feeling if we have common sympathy and some kind of emotional connection. I always take the girl out of the club and to my apartment explain that it is not until morning, but for a few hours. In that way there is no time for them to go back to the club.

    In the apartment I treat them like my girlfriend, respectfully, we drink wine, talk, ask about their life, get to know each other more, maybe this lasts for an hour (I am generally interested in people). Then shower and bed. Instead of expecting the girl to serve me, I serve the girl, kissing her all over the body and ending up with going down on her, usually giving her 1-2 orgasms. After this, the girl is open for everything. Oral sex on me fucking as much as I / we want.

    At my age, I can’t have sex 3 times a day, I am very happy with once a day. However, because of my age I can control myself, so in principle I can fuck for a long time in every position until I am physically exhausted and just want to rest.

    In about 50% of cases everything feels so good that I invite her back the next evening, maybe with dinner. Usually this pleases the girls a lot and the next day (s) we fuck like we are real lovers and this is the end of the world. Of course this is not what happens all the time, but maybe 50%, thanks to good interviewing.

    This time in Rio, the first night in Casablanca, I took a girl without proper interview and everything was mediocre and not interesting. The second night I found the gem: 18 years, very beautiful, second visit in her life to Casablanca. Big success we met the evening after as well.

    The rest of my time was shared between her and a beautiful student at one of the academic institutions that I visit in Rio. The student girl was not a pro, but she was looking for a sugar daddy and found me as a likely candidate! The first evening I was with her, I was uncertain what she was open for so I only took her for dinner. The next evening she was in bed.

    To finish, I had an interesting experience when I checked into hotel Windsor Excelsior the last 3 days because my apartment was no longer free. I wanted Pestana, but there were no rooms. Coming to the hotel room I read on some hotel instructions that no guests are allowed in rooms So in the evening I checked the student girl in as my girlfriend. It was fun and a bit embarrassing to see the face of the guy in reception when he checked in the 24 year old girlfriend of the 80-year old![/QUOTE]

  • English

    One way that Vagabundo manages the language barrier is with over the ear headphones. I give them to the girl, in this case Monique, who I have fucked twice BBFSCIP on this sabbath (shalom). I am listening to an Adam Sandler comedy on Netflix. Now usually another girl, like Anne Amari both regulates the number of fucks and the worst is that she insists on listening to some brazilian portoguese language sh7t like this is her mfkn country.

    So, that is one practical way to manage the language barrier.

    OK, now english speaking adds a factor of connection, especially when it is a college girl.

    college implies a wider world view. Monique here, bubble butt and all, hasn’t been further away from rio than a condor flies. A condor probably flies further away.

    So, there is that. You can declare your love for a college chick plan to have a family fantasize about that future, drive up the west coast of Ireland, scuba dive whats left of the great barrier reef in australia, or bang her in the shadow of the Eiffel tower or whatever. Does that make the sex better? An actual, good functioning marriage is the optimal situatiion. Does that ever really happen with a big age difference? A college chick is going to be into college guys. I am technically a college student, taking some language classes, but even with my limited game, I have legit college chicks giving me the big hug and calling me amor and texting me at night and calling and giving off all the they want the big vagabundo between their legs vibes — just not the exact ones I want, but that is just a matter of time. I still do 70 minutes of Muay Thai with the college athletes two times a week, and all the other MMA and swiming and foot volei, and it is good for my body and soul.

    What’s good for my dick is affordable negra bare pussy that also cooks cleans and goes to the swing and nude beach with me, and puts on the over the ear headphones and lets me watch a adam sandler movie in English.

    Would it be better if it were an Italian college or a Brazilian rich family chick from Recreio? That is coming, and it won’t be long. You just walk around the campus with your testicles emptied by rio’s finest hoars and you give off that Recreio Vice kinda vibe, and the girls just kind of smell the come fuck me smell, which is actually Nivea 5 multi use creme that the Muay Thai team mates recommend, and you kinda smear some of that over your legs while you’re spending your whiskey money on some college princess to tutor you in love songs in her language. I spent 500 reais on whiskey and red bull alone last time I went to Paris. I spent 100 reais last week on a real grand daughter of a Youth League for Lenin to explain to me the finer points of Miyagi I Found Love, which is a cool song

    Keep the Russian chicks coming, just let me know where to find more of them.

    selah.

  • The premium on a university student

    I can see that, especially a international student who could potentially be a Baby Momma, with a education and the ability to earn a income and pass on tradition history, etc.

    So Professor Vagabundo is at school today, and I get a Ï have a boyfriend from a girl who is tutoring me.

    I still pay her $100r to read me some music lyrics in her native tongue, which would look really good wrapped around my cock.

    But on the uber out of the university, two things happen.

    I text a italian university girl, like a hot af body building Italian girl. My inner Enzo Ferrari has like 12 cylinders churning as little Enzos find themselves flowing up my gonads to get in line.

    Then some Brazilian student who does want to hug me and start calling me amor and beijos and all that texts and calls in the hour long 100r ride back to Recreio.

    But I don’t feel that animal want to plough her brazilian big bunda the way I do my little Russian Seka doll

    But yesterday or the day before I fuck Monique, two times and night, once in the morning, BBFSCIP.

    She is coming back over Saturday for the swing at Paris.

    Well anyway, I can see the premium for a university girl. But then you have to look at the socioeconomic class — Nova Iguacu will get you a university federal, what specialty exactly? Hmm.

    Now there is a university in… ? … REDACTED heheh

  • Paris Tuesday night

    Tacoma a ISGer and I went to Paris last night, which was anticlimatic as I had trained 60 minutes Muay Thai at a university where I was smoking ganja with hot ass college chicks and the workers, but I was all pumped up from 60 minutes at a high heart zone rate so i wanted to go grab some ass and some numbers

    The hottest ass in paris is a new one, jessica, big not horse big bunda, she would not give me her wassap and even claimed she did not have insta. How is that for a fckin heisman?! as i have alluded to, reverse racism is a thing, as she is mulatta and i profile as white though i am half asian, which is not exactly a minority, is it? anyway, i am a victim of the hottest black women who enact reverse racism against me, haha. perhaps she was justified in lying to me as i made my first impression with her with sunglasses on over a big black eye from a fall on a hike though everyone obviously thinks it is from being punched, which is plausible as i box 2 times a week with the muay thai team on campus. but i grabbed her ass. she would do a 40 minute session for 350r. i dont give a fuk, as i was not going to session anyway, as was my wingman who has all the pussy he can handle from SA and repeats etc, as do i, and in any case talking to and chasing real college girls is more fun and exciting anyway, who needs apps, well there are the right wassap groups

    ok, anyway, i do know melissa, who has been there at paris for 3 years, and i have pernoited with her and she gave a bad session to senor nounce a few months ago. i chatted to melissa about a threesome, but i know how that goes, all covered, and then there are two girls at your place and scandalo, lose your apartment, etc, so it was just a idea. i would go to praia macumba smoke some ganja and fuk on the beach with these hoars anytime, but i have hoars for that who perform well.

    anyway, the realest and best in some ways interactoin of the night was with the girl at the front desk, who is also hot af btw. on the way in i say, i am a professioal, i am a go go boy like bruna surfistina dj, that gets a laugh. on the way out, i repeat the line, and she offers me a discount. my bill is 44 (30 entrada and 14r for my diet coke). i give her a 50. and she gives me 10, a 4 reais discount. but she does it with a sexy smile which says, hey vagabundo, i want to have your gringo lips and tongue buried between my legs eating my burning pussy on command. to which i say, eu sou go go boy, eu tenho piroca 32 centimeters, grosso (i have a thick 12 inch dick). normalmente, meninas me paga 500 reais por hora por voce vou fazer disconta. (normally women pay me 500 reais an hour to fuck them, but for you i will do a discount). she laughs and say, por mim 200 reais. (for me 200 reais, right?). there is a cop, policia militar officer REDACTED sitting there with a 9mm on his hip. i am playing a russian playlist (thanks miamiboy) on my gamer earbuds to learn russian for my real love a 22 year old russian exchange student who sits on my face while i play those songs every tuesday and thursay in the muay thai room where i have a key. (see world according to garp)

    so anyway, having gained 4 reais by my winning sense of humor, in front of her boss and a cop, i take out my earbuds because i might be offending some locals, and with my superb verbal judo, i go get the only new number of the night, i get the number of the cop, REDACTED!

    how is that for smooth.

    I go back to casa vagabundo, listen to russian music, like Miyagi I got love, play radio on music.youtube.com, and i play videos of my russian tutor sitting on my face which i shot tuesday afternoon on the muay thai mats with her light pink pussy lips, and then her asshole, impaled on the bright pink usb dildo that a fellow isg member brought me in january (17 usd on amazon), a 43 minute long video that is interrupted by her squirting all over my dji action 4 which fortunately has a scuba case

    the key to giving good head to a chick who can pick any dick in rio is to be her slave, and to use just the tongue

    and let her pick the porn

    even if it is hardcore fem dom porn

    i mean, i don’t care if she watches chicks with strapons fuck guys up the ass on the macbook as long as she lets me put my medium sized but thick dick up her ass to shoot a quick wad between writing her masters thesis at the library, which closes at 22h, which is when i leave campus

  • as a comparison, see

    https://barravipsrio.com/acompanhantes-rio-de-janeiro-yasmin-mineira

    yasmin mineira

    ok, she is hot af

    but by hoar years (dog years) she is old

    and she will ask 1500 r

    i fuk ed her for 150 in motel malaga and in a airbnb in botafogo in 2015 when she was 18 (do the dog year math)

    you can find plenty of mineiras (the hottest brazilians) in photoaccompanhantes and even vm (i have some pics), and do them bare for 150 at your place after doing a session in their spot

    but that takes some work, which means you need to come for minimum 2 weeks, better 2 months, and even better just don’t leave rio and give power of attorney on your house in the rich world so you can sell it when you get addicted to bare teen carioca kunt like henry ‘vagabundo’ miller

    and while i am at it here is some great investment advice

    buy recreio property

    easy to see the metro out here in 10 years if not 2

    [QUOTE=MaddTraveler;2912283]No matter what part of the world you monger in, this isn’t something girls do often pros or not. Most women won’t talk about their previous experiences since they want to appear as a good inexperienced girl for you. That’s a common and cheap sales tactic even telemarketers and scammers use; telling you so and so paid this and that. Same when a btch is telling me her ex did this or that then the imm reply is go back to that mofo. Why you left if he was so good? It’s a nasty and disgusting trick and why would any man fall for that? Simpin at a new level.[/QUOTE]

  • concur

    use bradesco for cash, 2500 daily limit

    [QUOTE=Nounce;2912270]You will be fine in Rio with the cards you have, and credit cards work well everywhere. I have been to only one remote city that the ATM don’t take foreign card at all.[/QUOTE]

  • spot on!

    now, end of month (april), i tell my girls i am out of money (which is true in my checking account, tho not brokerage), and get pernoite bbfscip 250r, and put them on the same city bus that i ride in and out with them to and fro, which shuts them up about the uber and saves me the uber and the time to go get change to pay the uber, actually 99, so i guess panda boy has my data too.

    [QUOTE=Tribute15;2912191]I am stunned. 3 k reals per session. I paid 700 reals for per noite for a stunner from Emporio Banho. All holes included, sin condom and CIP. I felt I got the short end of the stick, because Vagabundo says he pays 400 reals for his per noite. I met a beauty at Perola Negra and she came over for 4 hours everything included was 500 reals. Whenever I travel anywhere nowadays, and met beautiful women, once I hear their prices, I immediately use Brazil as my measuring gauge. I will convert and think of how many stunners and wonderful session I can get in Rio. That makes me pause and rethink.

    Still blown away thinking of how many top end escorts or sessions at Termas 3 k can get me. BTW you can tell you overpaid, if after 2 sessions, the girl cancelled on the third. Too each his own.[/QUOTE]

  • Haha, totally true. Not to laugh at any fellow monger, but by contrast, these are American prices for college girls, and there is a premium for being with a actual college girl who you could talk English with preferably.

    I am here with Monique, a 27 year old Negra, who I previously have been fucking in 2020-22, and it is 250r pernoite BBFSCIP, and she is a player — she will go with to the nude beach and come home with a white couple and swap, and she has a bunda that makes for good swinging as men do like to fuck her jiggly booty, including me. I went to Central and met her there, and took the 315 bus back for a total of 4.3 reais each for passagem. I recommend over ear earphones. I recommend also as alwas a vasco shirt and a bombeiro cap, knives (though never take them out unless actual last resort), and a taser flashlight.

    off to a good pernoite, again.

    [QUOTE=Mr Enternational;2911692]GHA. Gringo Hustling Academy.[/QUOTE]

  • Well played young Jedi

    The force is strong in this one

    [QUOTE=Tochka;2911625]My Airbnb apartment was a convenient three-block walk to the Starbucks in Cinelandia. The place is fking busy mid-morning. I stopped by a good coffee shop in the same building as Duda Massage Rio Branco 156. I go to the banco24 ATM inside the metro. Joining the ATM with a long ass line. Withdrawal cash, each time, no problems, during daytime.

    Afterward walk over to the underground stores to buy medium-sized bottles of whiskey, cognac, Hennessy, sugar-free Red Bulls, 2 packs of baby wipes, and plastic cups. BTW I keep the iphone on a leash around my neck, and stick it inside the shirt.

    Exit metro head to the security booths in the Branco 156 office building. Up the elevators to the top floor, then another stupid elevator. Find Duda massage. She rings me in before I have a chance to open the door. For the next four to six hours 11-5 pm, going through the entire prive afternoon lineup. Getting slurpy sloppy deepthroat from two nineteen-year-old garotas. An hour or two-hour duplo sessions, CIM w / swallow from Branca and Lightskin mulutta cuties posted on wassap.

    Damn totally forgot brasiliana garotas will swallow the entire load, and use their tongues to sop up spillage she missed. Pay a small tip. Then bounce to the next prive in the same building.

    The latest I stayed in centro was 7. 30 pm to get a haircut at the barbershop directly across the street across from Darkroom Praa Olavo Bilac 28. Walk back to Airbnb, keeping head on swivel. Change shower, head out to Solarium and Monte Carlos termas to hook up with Scandallo Garotas working there. Each night at closing leave with two garotas, uber or indriver to the short time motel panda motel in Botofoga.

    YMMV.[/QUOTE]

  • maybe i am the wrong person — definitely, i am the wrong person to say this, but

    IMHO, MaddTraveler has shared some super helpful information on the board, especially about blue house and paris and recreio

    we have to take the good with bad as to the information we get on this board and through interacting with board members

    that said, mr e is our most prolific poster for a reason, he’s almost always right

    just trying to see and value from both mr e and madd traveler

    [QUOTE=Mr Enternational;29107e20]How am I being defensive when there is nothing for me to defend against? Seems you are the one being defensive since you have to call people names and stuff. It is you that is coming to the conclusion as to why certain women will not date an older age group is due to something psychological deep inside of them instead of admitting that maybe it is just not their thing and they maybe just do not like old ass men. I tend to not worry about the people that do not want to date me and what could possibly be their reasons, and focus on the ones that do. Everything is not for everybody. So what is your reason for not dating old ass women? I am sure it is nothing derogatory or offensive.[/QUOTE]

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